Discovering...Love?

I’m on my way.

Alright, see you soon. Just wait out side the locker room door and I’ll come get you.

Will do, I text him back.

I had to tell him I was on my way, that way he could make sure the press was out of there. The last thing we needed was for a story to come out announcing that Sidney Crosby was going to be a father. We would wait for the Crosby’s to get here first.

I pull my green Wrangler into one of the parking spaces without a problem, I’m sure Sid had told all of security that I was coming.

I easily find my way through the arena and to the locker room, like I had countless times before. In front of the locker stands a man in a polo, with his arms crossed. I watch carefully before approaching as a reporter is shooed away. When I’m sure that the report has vamoosed, I walk over to the locker room. The big man turns to me with a frown that said he means business, but once he recognize he smiles kindly at me.

“Hey Tom,” I smile.

“Caitlin, it’s good to see you! Are you back?”

“Yeah, I’m back,” I can’t help but smile.

“Well, Mr. Crosby said he is expecting you, so just go ahead in,” he smiles opening the door for me.

“Thanks, Tom. See you later!” I smile walking through the open door.

I take a deep breath as I walk over to the lounge. The players were mostly still in the showers, and the few that weren’t in the main locker room must have been in the back sharpening skates and getting ready for the game tomorrow.

I sit down on one of the plush leather couches with a sigh, my back had begun to hurt recently with the extra weight I was carrying. Boy, were these couches ever comfortable. At the moment, my obvious bump was well concealed under my winter coat, but I had to shed the extra layer, it was stifling in here.

I watch NHL on the Fly on the TV in front of me, texting Sid my location. My knee bounces nervously and I crack my kuckles. I had no idea how the guys would react. I hoped they would be thrilled, but I had no idea. They could hate me for all I know. It was times like this I wish Bran were still here, sitting next to me and keeping me calm. I hear someone come in behind me and look up hoping it’s Sid. Instead, Coach Bylsma comes to a stop in the middle of the room smiling his crooked smile at me.

“Hey Caitlin. Looks like Sid wasn’t kidding,” he smiles warmly at me.

“Hey and no, no he wasn’t,” I chuckle my hand coming to rest on my rather large stomach.

“Well I have to go talk to someone really quickly, but I’m glad your back. That kid is actually smiling again, and his game has improved.”

“Haha, glad to help,” I laugh, “I’ll catch you later.”

“Congrats Caitlin,” he smiles before walking out of the room.

I hear someone come up behind me and I turn to see his hazel eyes smiling at me. He had a big grin on his face, I knew he was excited about today, he had practically been bursting at the seams not telling his teammates that he was going to be a father.

“Hey you two,” he says quietly, coming over to kiss my cheek and put a hand protectively on my stomach making me smile.

“Hey, good practice?”

“Yeah, good practice. Are you ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” I sigh nervously.

“Alright, I’ll go get them,” he smiles, he was like a 5 year old, anxious to show his friends.

I sigh as he walks back through the door way and jump slightly when it opens again behind him. I tense, waiting for the wave of guys, but it never comes. In walks the man who had recently taken to being my best friend and my rock. Those broad shoulders were the best on the East Coast to catch tears.

“Hey Ace,” he smiles coming over to give me a hug.

“Hey, I missed you,” I smile hugging him back tightly.

“Back at you. Although I don’t think I missed you as much as Sid. Wow, that kid is growing like a weed in there, eh?” He laughs turning me around so that he can take in my profile.

“As is the mother,” I sigh.

“You look beautiful,” he smiles at me.

“So they tell me,” I smile weakly; I was feeling more insecure about how I looked.

“Because it’s true!” he says hugging me, “You are glowing.”

I smile up at him softly, silently thanking him as I hear the door open.

Sid walks in first to stand next me and Kris leans against the couch, watching with a grin.

“ACE!!!” I hear a few yell; Colby and Max make a run for me.

However, they come to a screeching halt as Sid steps in front of me, shielding me and the baby from anything he though would be detrimental, which was basically anything short of a pillow.

“WHOA! Slow it down guys, baby on board,” he grins holding out his hands.

“What?” I hear Colby ask confused.

I let out a slightly annoyed huff and push Sid out of the way, allowing them to see what he means. “Honestly I’m not that fragile.”

“Whoa!” I hear Max say, as the rest of the guys remain silent in their shock. I don’t remember the last time I had heard them so quiet, if I ever had.

“5 months, we’ll hopefully know the sex after today’s appointment, and yes it’s Sid’s,” I smile hitting most of the questions, before biting my lip nervously.

“Are you going to name it after me?” I hear Colby ask with a grin, being the first to wrap me up in a hug.

“We missed you Ace,” he whispers in my ear and it almost brings tears to my eyes, damn hormones. “Congratulations!”

“Thanks Colby.”

“But no more running away, got it! I don’t think the kid could handle that again,” he laughs pointing his thumb to Sid who rolls his eyes, but his cheeks slightly pinkening.

“Of course they’re not going to name it after you,” Max says smacking Colby on the back of the head as he comes over to give me a big hug, “She’s going to name it after Uncle Max!” He says pulling away and bending down to talk to my stomach, “Hey in there, little Max! Do you think he will look like me?” He asks looking up at me.

“God I missed you,” I laugh loudly, pulling him into another hug.

“Aww, come here Siddy Poo, you’re going to be a daddy! I hope you understand that your kid is going to love me more than you,” Colby says pulling Sid into a hug as Sid desperately tries to get away.

All the guys give me a hug and give Sid one of those manly thumps on the back or a firm handshake congratulating him. After, we all sit down in the couches and around the lounge chattering about the next poker tournament at my house and how it wasn’t fair because I had my own portable snack shelf. I laugh along with the boys but I can’t help but notice one of them is missing. The one I was looking most forward to seeing. I let out a sigh as the door opens again, almost 10 minutes after my ‘unveiling.’ In walks a tall blond man, his blue eyes catching mine as he smiles at me almost shyly. I grin and get up off the couch, swatting away Colby’s hand as he tries to help me up. I quickly cross the room over to him. His eyes widen when he takes in my full appearance, but I don’t give him the chance to question me as I wrap myself around him in a tight hug.

“I’m so sorry I missed everything, Papa Staal,” I murmur against his chest.

He doesn’t respond at first and I can tell he is very uptight, but after a moment he let’s out a sigh and hugs me back tightly.

“It’s ok,” he murmurs into my hair, “But I think you are going to have to catch me up a bit, I would have been here sooner but SOMEBODY FILLED MY SHOES WITH BABY POWDER!”

I giggle as all of the guys look up innocently at him; the most innocently looks coming from Flower and Army.

“So tell me, how’s the littlest Staal?” I ask with a grin.

He grins back and pulls me into the locker room to his stall. He points to a picture of Anna holding a baby with blond hair and bright blue eyes.

“Wow, does he ever look like his daddy!” I grin looking up to the man with the matching blond hair and blue eyes, “What’s his name?”

“Shawn Nicholas Staal. We spell it S-h-a-w-n,” he adds for clarification, smiling at me.

I look up to him surprise, was he implying what I thought he was?

“Why did you spell it that way?” I ask cautiously.

“Well we couldn’t name him Caitlin, I’m pretty sure he would be teased for having a girl’s name,” he smiles down at me.

I feel the tears welling up again and hug him tightly.

“Jordan, I …” I say speechless, “Thank you.”

“Ace, if it weren’t for you. I’m not sure what would have happened. I might not have had the chance to be with Anna and my son. So thank you,” he whispers back, “Hey now, what’s with the tears? You’re not going soft on me are you?”

“I can’t help it, ok. It doesn’t take much to get the tears flowing these days,” I chuckle gesturing down to my stomach.

“Yeah, let’s talk about that shall we?” he smiles, pulling me down so that I sit next to him, “It’s Sid’s I assume.”

“Yeah, Sid’s the father,” I smirk, “I’m 5 months pregnant.”

“Do you know the sex yet?”

“No, we go to the doctor’s today and hopefully we’ll find out.”

“Congrats Ace. This is awesome, now there is another new parent on the team! Maybe it will take some heat off me.”

“Aww, Jordan, are they teasing you again?” I laugh.

“It wasn’t a coincidence that they put Baby Powder in my shoes today,” he says rolling his eyes.

I laugh as I hear the door open and Sid peeks in. “Are you about ready to go?” he asks.

I look down at my watch and realize that we have to be at the doctor’s in 20 minutes.

“Oh! Yeah, let’s go!” I say getting up and walking back into the lounge, Jordan following behind me.

“See you later boys,” I call, grabbing my coat from the back of the couch and putting it on.

“See ya Caitlin,” they call back, I smile everything was getting back to being good again. Max Talbot is twirling a silver key on his finger with a cocky grin. I put my hand in my jacket pocket and feel only one key on my key chain instead of two.

I shake my head and tell Sid I will meet him outside. He nods in confusion and heads out he door. I walk up to Max and stop in front of him. The room goes silent waiting for what I have to say.

“Just let the dogs out when you get there and don’t you dare wave a beer in front of my face because I can and will take you down,” I glare at him with a grin, “Oh, and I plan on kicking ass in poker, so be prepared!”

All the guys cheer and Max just smiles down at me, “See ya soon, Ace.”

I chuckle and head out the door to meet Sid.

* * * *

“Ready?” I smile over to him in the passenger’s seat. He had been looking slightly nervous, which I guess was understandable, being that it would be the first baby appointment he’s attended. He was also nervous that this would put the word out there that he was going to be a father, before talking to his dad and agent about it. Me? I was just excited to see my baby again and hoped that he or she would be willing to show Mom and Dad if he was a she or she was a he.

“Come on, let’s go!” I say getting out of the car.

I walk in through the front door while Sid goes around to the back. I tell the nurse at the counter that I’m here for my appointment… and that the father needed to be let in, he was around back.

She looks at me confused for a moment, looking back down at the clipboard before her eyes widen in understanding. I chuckle to myself before she quickly leads me to one of the ultrasound rooms. She closes the door behind me with a nervous, “I’ll be right back,” before heading out again.

I look around the clean room with a sigh as I wait, taking in the machinery and posters adorning the walls of baby growth charts. The door opens to reveal an older woman in her 50s dressed in a white lab coat and a stethoscope hanging from her neck. She had short peppered hair and glasses, lines around her mouth and eyes told me she smiled a lot and I almost immediately warmed up to her.

“Hello you must be Ms. Shaw?” she asks looking at her clipboard before sticking her hand out for me to shake.

“Please, it’s Caitlin,” I smile warmly, shaking her hand.

“Well then Caitlin, I’m Dr. Henderson and by the looks of things you are ready to see your baby,” she smiles looking at the clipboard once more.

“Yes I am,” I grin.

“Alright, in good time my dear, if you could lay back though. Now you don’t need to have any blood taken this week, but you will at your next visit, just to make sure your blood sugar is all right at that time. All the tests that were sent in from your last doctor are great; you are coming along very well at 21 weeks. All your blood tests are good. Have you been feeling nauseous at all?” She asks as I pull up my shirt and zip down my jeans to expose my swollen abdomen. She measures my bump and pokes around a bit. I was told that this would be happening at every visit now.

“No, not really anymore. But I have been having a little back pain,” I say trying not to leave anything out.

“Sharp pains or achy?”

“Achy.”

“Yes, that’s going to keep up I’m afraid. Have you felt any movement at all?” she asks checking my blood pressure.

At that moment there is a knock on the door and Sid steps into the room accompanied by the wide-eyed nurse I saw at the front desk.

“Ah, yes, Mr. Crosby, come on in,” Dr. Henderson smiles, glancing up quickly from her watch as her finger lies gently on my wrist taking my pulse. “I was just telling Caitlin that everything looks good. Both baby and mom are healthy. So, if you want we can start the sonogram.”

I nod my head eagerly as I bite my lip, trying to hold back my grin. I look up to Sid, who is already looking down at me with a smirk. He comes to stand beside me, switching places with Dr. Henderson. Just feeling his presence next to me helps me to relax and at the same time excites me more. He smiles down at me before reaching down to lace his fingers with mine.

Dr. Henderson smears a clear goop on my ever-expanding stomach I flinch at its coldness. She turns on the machine and presses the wand-like part on my stomach in the goop. We both look to the monitor as we hear a whirling like sound.

“That’s your baby's heart beat. It’s strong that’s good. And there you can see it’s head, its heart…” she says pointing things out on the screen as my grin grows wider and I feel Sid squeeze my hand, “Would you like to know the sex?”

“Yes!” Sid and I say enthusiastically at the same time. We both look at each other and let out a chuckle.

“Well, ok then,” Dr. Henderson laughs, “It looks like your baby is cooperating and will to show us.”

“Unlike my last appointment,” I laugh, remembering the baby not at all cooperating like I had hoped.

“Well, according to these three little lines here, it looks like you are having a girl,” she smiles over at us, “Congratulations!”

I look over to Sid who has a huge grin on his face, one that matches mine. A girl, I’m having a girl!

Dr. Henderson continues on about some things, including telling Sid to not give into my cravings because everything that I could be craving could not be good for the baby. After wiping off the goo on my stomach, she gives us some last advice saying that she will see me in two weeks.

I finish buttoning my jeans and look up at Sid, he was looking out the window with a frown.

“Sid? What’s wrong?”

“It’s just… we’re having a girl,” he sighs.

I was taken aback by his statement, he had been grinning just as widely as I was a few minutes ago.

“You wanted a boy?” I ask, slowly. I guess I understood that, carrying on the Crosby bloodline, have him grow up playing hockey like his dad, maybe be better in the NHL. A girl couldn’t be drafted into the NHL.

“No, no. I didn’t have a preference, I just want it… her to be healthy,” he smiles at me.

“Then what’s wrong?” I ask confused. Was it me?

“Well, if it’s a girl and if she looks anything like her mother, the guys will be all over her,” he frowns.

I can’t help but throw my head back and laugh at his statement.

“Sid, please if she is anything like me, she won’t have any trouble keeping those guys at bay,” I smile.

He chuckles and steps closer to me, resting his head against my forehead and putting his hand on my stomach. He smirks, looking down at my stomach before looking back up into my eyes. His eyes were a golden hazel when his smile reached them.

“We’re having a baby girl,” he whispers.

I can feel the tears welling up at the emotion that was going through my body. This was the tender moment that I had dreamed of, and it made me melt hearing him say those words. Right now, I was unspeakably happy. I smile and nod, unable to find the words. Him saying those words, it felt real. It felt like he was finally in this. I wasn’t going to do this alone; my daughter would have her father who already loved her. It was an almost overwhelming feeling. He would be there with me, watching as our daughter grew up. It was like a weight lifted from my shoulders. I could count on him.

“Sidney?” I say quietly, still gazing into his golden eyes.

“Yeah?”

“I love you too,” I whisper, finally saying the words that I had felt for long, long time. The words that I never stopped feeling, but couldn’t say after I left. The words that he had said to me the day after Christmas but that I couldn’t return.

He looks at me, his eyes shining a smile gracing his lips. One of his hands comes up to cup my jaw, his thumb lightly brushing over my jawbone. He gaze shifted down before his eyes were up at mine again. The touch, the look, it was the same as it was when we were together, it was the same under the mistletoe a year ago, it was the same at the beach 5 years ago. It was so familiar, but the butterflies still stormed my stomach. My eyes flutter shut as his lips touch mine ever so softly, but making it feel as though an electric current has just gone through me. He pulls away for only a moment before his lips are on mine again. I lean into his touch, my arms finding their way around his neck, my fingers finding his soft short hair. I sigh into the kiss as I kiss him back, wanting nothing more than for this moment to last forever. I knew this kiss wouldn't fix everything, but it was part of the building blocks. It didn't mean Sid and I were taking the next flight to Vegas to elope. It was part of a new beginning, one that would was gentle and soft and patient, not rushing anything. It held a promise and a hope that there would one day be more between the two of us, maybe not today, but one day soon.

After a few minutes he breaks away slowly, panting ever so softly as I am. He kisses my forehead softly, letting the kiss linger before pulling me gently into a tight hug, his head finding the nook where my neck and shoulder connect. It felt right. It felt like everything was falling back in place and it felt incredible to be in his arms again after sharing the most tender kiss I had ever received.

“Let’s go home,” he says softly into my neck.